I think it’s time for another post about Hubby. There are so many reasons why. I decided to do it now because of what happened with K’s respite last week. But also to reassure him that cracking my rib was not his fault.
Yes, he did, and it’s a funny story. Let’s have a flashback first. Hubby and I have known each other since we were 14. This year we celebrate our 20th wedding anniversary. In all those years my number one complaint was that he is never romantic. Ok, I can’t say never. He has his moments, as few and far between they are. So he was sitting in the living room and as I walked by he grabbed me and gave me a hug. Very nice. Then he tried to lift me up. I guess the position was wrong because all we heard was a “pop” and the pain shot through my side like a bullet. An X-Ray confirmed it was fractured. There is nothing you can do for a fractured rib except rest, take muscle relaxers, and a pain pill if you need it. Trust me, I need it.
Hubby feels so bad. And the last thing I want is to cause him more stress! (See “When employers don’t understand” and “Losing respite”) I try to help but sometimes the pain just gets too much. I try not to let it show but he knows. I went for a nap and when I woke up the entire main floor was spotless! He and B had done it. It was wonderful.
I know how much stress Hubby is under. And yet he still shows how strong he is day after day. Not just physically, but mentally as well! His patience with K is unbelievable! But he is always on 24/7 alert! No matter where K is or what he is doing, if they need help, they call Hubby. He never gets respite, even when K was at respite. I think when K goes to permanent care it will be harder on Hubby than on me. Especially the transition period where we can’t see him for 3 months.
And to top it all off he is dealing with a wife on stress leave and in therapy, AND who is now out of commission for a couple of weeks. He doesn’t want me to worry, but I can’t help it. I see the crap he is dealing with at work is affecting him so much, but there is nothing I can do. I feel so helpless. I love him so much, and he has been there for me “in sickness and in health”, but I don’t know how to be there for him. I hope and pray that the issues with his work get settled soon. I hope and pray we find a happy and safe environment for K soon. I hope and pray I get better soon and get back to work. But soon is never soon enough sometimes.
I love you baby. Always and Forever.